Procreation Inc.

This is what I got from Cedric's birthday celebration last week.

Wow I never knew...my clique of band boys have such brilliant ideas. Hahaha.

It all started with....the Tammy video, which I have absolutely no memory of. After some memory refresh from the boys, it was actually some sex private video not meant to be made public. Which did and created big hoo-haa quite a few years back. It's amazing how the boys remember and I can't even recall.

Me: "How do you guys remember such things?"
Tzih Yih: "Because I SBB (Se Beh Beh aka lecherous uncle) ma."
Me: "HAHAHA. That was actually your project for the module SBB201 right."
Tzih Yih: "OMG you found out. Actually the whole Edison Chen scandal was my thesis for SBB400.."
Me: "HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA."

Topics somehow moved to prostitution areas in the world. I shared my knowledge of the practice in Amsterdam (got it from JiaHui - SMUBE), Thailand (from my prof - he was doing a paper on it la, don't tink otherwise) and China (I was there to see it myself). Tzih Yih shared his about Geylang (no surprise..) and some other SEA countries. The other boys started to chip in too.

And the greatest business plan started to form. All because Tzih Yih's biggest dream is to be King Pimp. HAHA.

As this business is morally wrong politically correct, we will take on a neutral name: Procreation Inc. It's very 挂羊头卖狗肉 meaningful business where we can help push sex rates up in this increasingly lonely planet. As we are fulfilling humans' needs from the very bottom level of Maslow's hierarchy of needs, we are certain this business plan can take off.

Company Motto
When you hold the world by its balls, you are in control 

Company Slogan
Make love, not war

And so as what Tzih Yih says, when we are in control, the world will finally be at peace. HAHA.
Our office area will have babes as security guards, wearing a different set of uniform everyday to fit different themes. They are to carry handcuffs and whips around instead of guns. Of coz walkie-talkies are required because they are hired for safety of our office in the first place. DUH.

To start the business on the right note, we will have a network of prostitutes valued employees under our wings and we will start the pimping business. We will start it small where it's vibrant. So we will start in Vietnam and Thailand first. Headquarter will be situated in Singapore. I head the Business Development department where I will be the one exploring opportunities and diversifying our portfolio. Shiyuan as the Biological Science student will be the one handling our R&D where we will discover ways to curb HIV since that's the one of the main concerns of our business. Jiahui the Business student will be handling our finances (when to invest in quality role-playing costumes and stuff like that). Alan the IT student will be handling our online bookings and webpage maintenance.  Cedric and Daniel the engineering students, will be involved in engineering well funky toys under the R&D department. Wendy the physiotherapist will ensure we all practise good postures and of coz, well being of everyone. Tzih Yih? Chairman HoTY (Ho Tzih Yih). HAHA

When our profits are stable, we will expand our networks to centralize all brothels business centres, taking idea from Amsterdam's prostitutes workers' welfare network. This will also be the time where we will start to change our revenue drivers mixture. From mainly commoners on the streets, we will include more high end consumers now. We thrive to serve consumers from all levels.

This is where taking over hotels/resorts and airline companies come into the picture. Hotels will now take on the new identity of HoTYels (in view of Chairman HoTY). It's to capture the individuals from the HNW (High Net Worth) and UHNW (Ultra-High Net Worth). Why airline companies? I have the idea of purchasing A380s where we have cabins installed and our clients can do whatever services they require from our company. The same goes for the pilots since our planes will be set to autoflight mode and they are free to enjoy the exact services. As what Chairman HoTY says: "That's what cockpits are designed for what." I came up with the idea that all air stewardesses for our company planes will be our valued employees. Costume attractions is fatal. And I swear, we will probably attract best talents with such fantastic employee perks.

As we gain foothold in the industry, we aim to educate the public. Chairman HoTY will donate funds to his school and have the library named after him. One request is to have a section of the library dedicated to books on sexology and our business. He will advocate the start of a degree in Sexology as well. This course will include video-making, excursions to our brothels business centres and of course, real life experiments. Students are encouraged to be part of their own experiment. Investment in education is mandatory, this is to ensure a steady stream of talents into our corporation in future.

We plan to have our own theme parks as well where the main focus is on procreation. There will be walk-throughs and try-outs for interested parties. We do not believe in hard selling.

Chairman HoTY believes the team will make it to the cover of TIME magazine before we all hit 30 and will be labelled People of the year. We will grace business magazines' covers with Chairman HoTY in the middle, holding 2 valued employees by his side. He plans to build a new Procreation Mansion. Playboy Mansion will be part of history. We vision ourselves to be the number 1 company to work for in future as well.

To capture the UUHNW (Ultra Ultra High Net Worth) market, we intend to take this business to the space in future. Building HoTYels (in the name of Chairman HoTY) on the moon and probably Mars as well. In the future when our R&D takes off in more advanced stages, we might wanna expand our business to the Milky Way. Our client base will include aliens as well. In terms of the monetary value they can provide us in return, we are uncertain.

Chairman HoTY has no intentions of finding a successor as he believes he's the only one who can handle this business. So he intends to have all employees buried with him in his tomb and all Terra Cottas will be in bikini and G-strings.

Bottom line is : SEX SELLS. And whatever that sells, earn big bucks. Big bucks translates into big returns for every cent invested.


As you can see, this business plan is worth the globe man. Any keen investors? HAHA
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